You're having a conversation, but you don't get to speak a word. Something doesn't go according to the plan and you're the one he blames (责备). Whether it's a family member, a co-worker or (worse) your boss, a difficult person can turn a perfectly good day into a terrible experience without any reason. We all meet such people in our life who drive us nuts!
你正在谈话，但你一个字也说不出来。事情没有按照计划进行，而你就是他责备的人。无论是家人、同事，还是 ( 更糟糕的 ) 你的老板，难缠的人会毫无理由地把原本美好的一天变成糟糕的经历。我们在生活中都会遇到这种让我们发疯的人！
When we meet a difficult person, or if we have one in our family or circle of friends, our instinct (本能) is to try changing the person. This never works! In fact, when you try to change someone he/she is likely to be angry with you, he/she usually refuses to give in, and things will get worse.
当我们遇到一个难缠的人，或者如果我们的家庭或朋友圈有这样的人，我们的本能就是尝试改变这个人。这绝不会奏效！事实上，当你试图改变某人时，他 / 她可能会对你生气，他 / 她通常拒绝让步，事情会变得更糟。
The way to deal with difficult people is to know where they are coming from. I try to find their value language. Value language is what someone values most. It is what drives their decisions. For some people it is money; for others, it is power or knowledge. This not only helps me understand them, but also helps them relax and become more open-minded. For example, sometimes they just want to explain their opinions. If you let them talk to you, that might help them not blow up.
对付难缠的人的方法是知道他们来自哪里。我试图找到他们的价值语言。价值语言是人们最看重的东西。这是他们做出决定的动力。对一些人来说，是钱 ; 对另一些人来说，它是权力或知识。这不仅帮助我了解他们，也帮助他们放松，变得更豁达。例如，有时他们只是想解释他们的观点。如果你让他们和你说话，这可能会帮助他们不发脾气。
Some difficult people can be toxic (有毒的). Toxic people can be mean or hurtful. So, if you have to deal with them, keep your distance. Toxic relationships are harmful. So, you need to create a buffer zone (缓冲区) by surrounding yourself with good friends, seeing them less,★ and, if you have to be with them, do it for the minimum amount of time.
有些难缠的人可能是有毒的。有毒的人可能很刻薄或很伤人。所以，如果你必须与他们打交道，请保持距离。有毒的关系是有害的。所以，你需要和好朋友在一起来为自己创造一个缓冲区，少和那些难缠的人见面，并且如果你必须和他们在一起，用最少的时间来相处。
难句分析：
★ So, you need to create a buffer zone by surrounding yourself with good friends, seeing them less, ...
所以，你需要和好朋友在一起来为自己创造一个缓冲区，少和那些难缠的人见面……
现在分词短语 seeing them less 在句中作状语。
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